The Rendezvouz Cafe And Lounge

[yankee-in-france]

My condolences to you and your family, Elaine.

[DocTar]

Elaine, my heartfelt sympathy for the loss of your mom. I am so glad you had a great vacation.....

[chance]

Elaine I am so sorry for your loss. You are right though she is in a better place.

Glad your vacation was a great one.

[pax]

All the best to you Elaine. I know you love her with all your heart. She raised a great daughter.

[CherokeeKid]

Elaine, my heartfelt sympathy to you and your family. At least, your Mom and your Dad are together again.

Hope something works out for you that you can escape to Aruba for a bit, if it's only for a week or so. Sending you positive thoughts.

[Siddalee]

Elaine, I'm so sorry to learn of your mother's passing away...time heals the pain but the memories of good times together can last forever. Take care -

[jacqueline]

Elaine, I am so sorry to hear of your mom's passing as you said she is at peace and with your father and God now, take care.

[Elaine S]

Thanks for your kind words yiffy, DT, chance, pax, CK, sid, and jacqueline. I appreciate it very much.

[SavannahStar]

Hi everyone! Arrived home last Saturday after a wonderful vacation, but as soon as my feet hit the ground, I got a call that my Mom wasn't doing well. Sadly, she passed away on Wednesday. I know she waited for my brother and I to return. My head tells me it was the best thing because she's at peace, but my heart's heavy. I'd like nothing more then to pack a suitcase and go back, and if I weren't still working it's exactly what I'd do. Aruba was fantastic.

Oh my, Elaine....I missed this post.

I am so so so sorry. You have my prayers and sympathy for your loss. I still think of both my Mom and Dad so much, and often with tears.....life without your parents is never quite the same.

You take care. I'm glad you had a wonderful time in Aruba.

[PerryPeabody]

Elaine-
I am so, so sorry to hear of your loss.
I know that it is little comfort but your mom is at peace and she can't hurt.
Tears come to my eyes for you. I remember what it feels like.

[Elaine S]

Thank you Savannah and Perry. My Dad's been gone for almost 44 years, and I still think of him often, and how much of our lives he missed.

I had a set routine after work running to the nursing home to feed my Mom her dinner, and visit with her. Today's the first Monday in a very long time where I came straight home. It's a sense of relief, and sadness all rolled into one, and I know that anyone who cared for an elderly parent knows exactly what I mean. Everyone's telling me it's time for me now, but I'm not sure how to do that just yet. Eventually, I'll have a new routine I guess.

Again... thank you for your kindness.

[SavannahStar]

Thank you Savannah and Perry. My Dad's been gone for almost 44 years, and I still think of him often, and how much of our lives he missed.

I had a set routine after work running to the nursing home to feed my Mom her dinner, and visit with her. Today's the first Monday in a very long time where I came straight home. It's a sense of relief, and sadness all rolled into one, and I know that anyone who cared for an elderly parent knows exactly what I mean. Everyone's telling me it's time for me now, but I'm not sure how to do that just yet. Eventually, I'll have a new routine I guess.

Again... thank you for your kindness.

OMG OMG OMG can I ever relate to that, Elaine!!!!!!....the "set routine" part. You know, so many times I felt burdened, I'll be honest. And SO many times since his death I have cried and thought I would give anything in the world to have that all back. All the running, geez, the hospitals, the drs. appts., the assisted living....contending with all of it, sometimes his "crotchedy-ness".....just the responsibility of it...cutting into MY life. But you know I look back, and strangely enough, those two and a half years that I had with him, after my Mom died, are so very cherished. I wouldn't trade that for anything in the world. It's a very, very precious part of my life that I truly miss. If I were to give another "baby-boomer" any advice on the caregiving of their elderly parent(s) I would just say EMBRACE it. It's truly, truly a gift from God. I do miss my Dad so much, I still cry about him sometimes.

[gwen]

Elaine, I am so sorry to hear about your mom! My thoughts are with you and take care of you!

[Need2Know]

Hi everyone! Arrived home last Saturday after a wonderful vacation, but as soon as my feet hit the ground, I got a call that my Mom wasn't doing well. Sadly, she passed away on Wednesday. I know she waited for my brother and I to return. My head tells me it was the best thing because she's at peace, but my heart's heavy. I'd like nothing more then to pack a suitcase and go back, and if I weren't still working it's exactly what I'd do. Aruba was fantastic.

Oh Elaine, I have not been on this thread in a while, I am very sorry for your loss my friend, cherish the memories and remember the joy. I am always here if you need me.

[Elaine S]

Thank you gwen, and thank you N2K. I can't tell you how much it means to me to read your kind and thoughtful words!

Savannah... I know how you can relate to everything I'm feeling. Like you, I was the one who did all the running, and all the decision making, and I was so tired towards the end. I needed a vacation desperately, and I think my Mom knew it, and waited until I got home. It was the first year on Aruba that I kept a very low profile in that I wasn't running around every night until the wee hours of the morning. I spent more time in my unit then ever before because I didn't even realize how worn out I was until I got there.

Like you, I cherish the time I spent with my Mom. And, I have not one regret about what I "should" have done or what I "could" have done to make her life more comfortable, and the end more peaceful. I know in my heart that I did everything, and hope that I was a good role model for my daughter in showing her the way a child should respect and treat a parent.

[Need2Know]

Thank you gwen, and thank you N2K. I can't tell you how much it means to me to read your kind and thoughtful words!

Savannah... I know how you can relate to everything I'm feeling. Like you, I was the one who did all the running, and all the decision making, and I was so tired towards the end. I needed a vacation desperately, and I think my Mom knew it, and waited until I got home. It was the first year on Aruba that I kept a very low profile in that I wasn't running around every night until the wee hours of the morning. I spent more time in my unit then ever before because I didn't even realize how worn out I was until I got there.

Like you, I cherish the time I spent with my Mom. And, I have not one regret about what I "should" have done or what I "could" have done to make her life more comfortable, and the end more peaceful. I know in my heart that I did everything, and hope that I was a good role model for my daughter in showing her the way a child should respect and treat a parent.

I can totally relate my friend, I lost my dad six years ago and my mom back in 1986. My dad was living with me and my family the last four years of his life and that gives me peace knowing I had him close to me and was there for him at the end of his life when he needed me the most. I miss both of them very much and cherish the love we all shared.

[Elaine S]

I can totally relate my friend, I lost my dad six years ago and my mom back in 1986. My dad was living with me and my family the last four years of his life and that gives me peace knowing I had him close to me and was there for him at the end of his life when he needed me the most. I miss both of them very much and cherish the love we all shared.

N2K ~ I know from the kindness you've shown me through the years what a caring person you are ~ so there's no doubt in my mind that you were a wonderful son.

[DocTar]

Some of you may have seen this before. I got it in an email last week, and it brought tears to my eyes...my mom has been gone so long and I still miss her every day!

MOTHERS

Real Mothers don't eat quiche;
They don't have time to make it.

Real Mothers know that their kitchen utensils
Are probably in the sandbox.

Real Mothers often have sticky floors,
Filthy ovens and happy kids.

Real Mothers know that dried play dough
Doesn't come out of carpets.

Real Mothers don't want to know what
The vacuum just sucked up...

Real Mothers sometimes ask 'Why me?'
And get their answer when a little
Voice says, 'Because I love you best.'

Real Mothers know that a child's growth
Is not measured by height or years or grade...
It is marked by the progression of Mommy to Mom to Mother.....

The Images of Mother

4 YEARS OF AGE - My Mommy can do anything!

8 YEARS OF AGE - My Mom knows a lot! A whole lot!

12 YEARS OF AGE - My Mother doesn't know everything!

14 YEARS OF AGE - My Mother? She wouldn’t have a clue. .

16 YEARS OF AGE - Mother? She's so five minutes ago.

18 YEARS OF AGE - That old woman? She's way out of date!

25 YEARS OF AGE - Well, she might know a little bit about it!

35 YEARS OF AGE - Before we decide, let's get Mom's opinion.

45 YEARS OF AGE - Wonder what Mom would have thought about it?

65 YEARS OF AGE - Wish I could talk it over with Mom.

[chance]

Thanks Doc that was great and so true.

[jacqueline]

[quote="DocTar"]Some of you may have seen this before. I got it in an email last week, and it brought tears to my eyes...my mom has been gone so long and I still miss her every day!

I can relate to that DocTar, my mum was my best friend she passed away at the age of 39, I miss her so much and always will. My mother passed away just a few days before Mothers Day, so needless to say that time is not good for me, but there is one thing I would like to share is that as I sat in the living room I saw the look between my parents, a look of eternal love my mother passed away that night.

[Elaine S]

I can relate to that DocTar, my mum was my best friend she passed away at the age of 39, I miss her so much and always will. My mother passed away just a few days before Mothers Day, so needless to say that time is not good for me, but there is one thing I would like to share is that as I sat in the living room I saw the look between my parents, a look of eternal love my mother passed away that night.

jacqueline... your post gives me chills. What a terribly young age. I'm so sorry, and you missed so much. I'm sure a lot of your Mom lives through you... my Mother, Myself.

DT... I have seen that before, and obviously the words never meant as much to me as they do now... thanks for posting it.

We go through some pretty tough times in life, don't we? And, it's like bad spells. Yesterday my sister in law's (my brother's wife) Mom passed away. There's so much turmoil going on within our families. I've decided that I'll go to the service tomorrow, but I just can't take another burial right now. It's not in me to go, and I have already apologized.. just can't do it.

[pax]

Thanks DocTar, that's beautiful.

Yes Elaine, we all sure do go through some tough times. Take care.

I know what you mean jacqueline. Your mom must have been a thoughtful caring person. You reflect that with your kindness.

[Knipoog]

My condolences to you and your family, Elaine.



•“Mother - that was the bank where we deposited all our hurts and worries.”- T. DeWitt Talmage

[jacqueline]

Elaine, sorry I did not mean to give you chills and I hope that you are well and adjusting if that is the right word to use and yes life can be a challenge at times. I have learnt that there is only so much heartache one can have and we have to know our limit, you had no need to have had to apologized for not attending or to anyone.

Take care

[DocTar]

My mom died of cancer over 40 years ago when I was 20. My youngest sister was 11. It changed so much for her family. We became very dysfunctional. I often wonder what it would have been like to have had her into her old age...all her sisters are still living. I think my life would have been so much different had she lived longer. Elaine, you are so blessed to have had your mom for as long as you did. I am so glad that you did.